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Application Letter Revision

Application Letter Revision

Explain why the following letter of application is ineffective. Rewrite it to make it more precise and appropriate. Please read page 280 to page 288. Letter:
Apartment 32
Jeggler Drive
Talcott, Arizona
Monday
Grandt Corporation
Production Supervisor
Capital City, Arizona
Dear Sir:
I am writing to ask you if your company will consider me for the position you announced online recently. I believe that with my education (I have an associate degree) and experience (I have worked four years as a freightsupervisor), I could fill your job.
My schoolwork was done at two junior colleges, and I took more than enough courses in business management and informationtechnology. In fact, here is a list of some of my courses: Supervision, MaterialsManagement, Work Experience in Management, E-commerce, SafetyTactics, Introduction to Software Analysis, Art Design, Contemporary BusinessPrinciples, and Small Business Management. In addition, I have worked as a loading docksupervisor for the last two years, and before that I worked in the military in the Quartermaster Corps.
Please let me know if you are interested in me. I would like to have aninterview with you at the earliest possible date, since there are some other firms also interested in me, too.
Eagerly yours,
George D. Milhous

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